Freakin

Well everybody, it has come. The day that I have dreaded above all others. I thought I could avoid it, it was taboo to me. If I never spoke the word or allowed the thought to enter my head, then it wouldn’t happen. But it happened, and I am still shuddering. Cockroaches. The word that every expat fears. I stepped out into my kitchen from the bathroom to wash my hands, and a gigantic insect striped orange and brown with WINGS dropped out of nowhere onto the sink right in front of me. I promptly shrieked and ran from the room, and proceeded to jump up and down wringing my hands while contemplating whether to attempt to grab the Raid from under the sink, or to jump out of my four story window. Meanwhile, the hellish beast was ominously crawling around the sink, apparently attracted to the bright yellow lemon soap my roommate had bought. I figured that it was pretty well distracted and, while holding a frying pan for protection, I slowly opened the cabinet under the sink, grabbed the orange scented Raid, and started spraying for my life screaming all the time (“ohmygawshohmygawshohmygawh go back to hell!!!”). After I had sufficiently sprayed it (I was feeling lightheaded) and confirmed it dead, I continued to freak. I had been talking to my friend Mindy earlier and I called her back in a panic shrieking, arms flailing, and, well, panicking. She talked to me and calmed me down.

I think this counts as a panic attack. I haven’t heard myself scream that loudly since the 10 minutes directly after I met Tyler Glenn at In N Out Burger. I haven’t spent more than thirty consecutive seconds in my kitchen since. And I can’t stop thinking about what else there could be looming in my China future. Where did it come from in the first place? What if there are more? What if there is an entire colony of them in my ceiling??? What do they do up there? Like when I am sleeping? I can’t do this. Nowhere is safe. They are everywhere, waiting for their moment. They’ve been waiting for millions of years, growing in numbers and evolving WINGS APPARENTLY. I am having daymares about future face-offs with the roaches. I must arm myself and fight for my home. They will not take this away from me. Ugh my throat hurts from screaming. I need to relax…

Phew. Okay I am much better. Had some food. Had a coke. Removed a lot of profanities from what I had previously written. Did I overreact? Not in the least. Although I have since discovered that it was most likely not a cockroach that I saw, and just some other gigantic and terrifying insect. With WINGS might I remind you. I am currently sitting in my Poverty class waiting for the teacher to come and all the students think that he’s not coming. At least the other students are here. Not like the fiasco of last week. I went to one of the classes that I potentially wanted to take, which is all the way at Xianlin campus. I live and have most of my classes at Gulou campus, and they are about half an hour away by bus, 45 minutes by subway. So I arrived in the classroom and NOBODY WAS THERE. Apparently it was a class that doesn’t start for another three weeks. It didn't say that on the course list. Nope. They just left that little detail out. And it is totally normal for the teacher to be twenty minutes late in this world. In the America, if a teacher were to be late, they would send you 8,000 emails and apologize. I don't even know my teachers' email address! Things are different here, people. To add to my disappointment that I had just gone two hours out of my way for no class, it was raining. What? But I love the rain! Not in China. Normally after rain, everything is beautiful and clean and smells fresh. In Nanjing, although rain does clear a lot of the pollution from the sky for a day or two, it mostly just sort of spreads all the dirt around and makes everything humid and muggy for the next few days. 

Am I complaining a lot? I don't mean to! I've actually had a great week. I don't feel sick anymore, I have a great new roommate, I went shopping this weekend. I guess some days things like dirty rain and cockroach-like hell beasts and being constantly stared at can get on my nerves. But I promise I am not constantly in a bad mood. Like I said, this weekend I went shopping with the study abroad girls (Woot!). Shopping in China is the best. You can find any possible style that you want, and if you aren't satisfied with the price, you can haggle for a better one! Sizes are kind of annoying. I went into a jeans store and asked the lady if I could try some on, and she sneered at me and said "We don't carry your size here" and I said "Oh, is it because I'm such a fat American?" and she just smiled and I walked away. But other than that I pretty much love everything. Also we found the coolest cellphones!

Oh it's just a cute little toy car

NOT! It's a cellphone!

 So Cute right? The Asian people are connoiseurs of cute. I bought a shirt that makes me look like a sailor and some stripy patterny leggings. Also I saw this:

Communist Panda

For my friends who speak Chinese I died laughing because it's a 毛泽东的熊猫, A 毛猫。Well I think it's funny! It was a fun trip.

Also I mentioned that my roommate moved in right? She is fantastic! Her English name is Maggie and she is adorable. Last night we were talking about Chinese stereotypes towards women, and we had just finished our conversation and I absentmindedly started whistling Mario. She said "hey did you know that in China, girls aren't really supposed to whistle? It's seen as a guy thing". She has never been able to whistle! So I spent the next 20 minutes wikihow-ing how to teach someone how to whistle. We made excellent progress. I'll have to post some pictures of her soon because she is the cutest.

I think that's pretty much it! Upcoming events hopefully will include a trip to Qingdao and definitely include lots of homework. For now,

China tip, never lean your head back against any headrest, ever, and

China pic of the day:

Why is there a picture of Santa Claus in my composition classroom in China in September? I do not have the answer to that question.



Bye now!